I feel I don't know you.

I've loved you for years. You've been the owner of my mind for days and days, the queen of my dreams every time I slept. But you aren't now, not yet.
You're living happily. I don't think so, but you like to pretend it and I'm not going to take part into your performance.
I'm sorry, but I can't get you. I can't stand the way you live, the way you are wasting your minutes. You've recently said me that I don't speak with you, you explained me you could feel my cold but, what can I do? I don't talk to you because there's nothing I can tell you.
However, let me tell you something. Do you know why I'm not talking to you? Because the only thing I really want to say you is how much you have disappointed me. You disappoint me deeply, every day. I used to be proud of my capability of knowing what you think only looking at your eyes: I don't want to look at them now because I don't know what will I find. Because the only thing I really want to say is that everyone say that you are not as happy as you were with me, by my side, and they're right. You are not the same, where are you? where are your  shining eyes? where is your unforgettable smile?

And, do you know why I know I'm right? Because every time you talk to me I can see your eyes asking for my help, looking for my warmth, but I'm sorry. There's no any warmth for you right now, there's nothing you can do because, maybe, you are losing me. And this is not because another person, this is because of you. This is because your losing your essence, and I'm hating you because of that. I'm not going to love you if you are not the mysterious, crazy person I knew, I'm not going to love if you are not going to leave everything because of going to somewhere to do some stupid thing, only because you really want it. I'm not going to love you if you are a boring person, with a planned future and without any desire of experimenting, of adventures. I'm not going to love you if you have lost yourself, because, nowadays, I don't know where's the person I ever met, the person who got me crazy with only smiling.

You have hurt me. You have hurt me lots of times, you have left me alone. And I hate you because of that, because you left me alone, and you hurt me, and you are the person who can hurt me the most. I advised you I would leave, but you didn't take me seriously. I'm leaving now, and I'm leaving because if I stay by you I will be witness of how you are destroying yourself, and, for me, it's a pitty. Because the world is losing the best personality that has never been born, and this call for my tears.

 I'm stopping now, because I only will hurt you. Don't worry, I won't hurt you as much as you did. Be happy with your fake, fairy tale. I hope you realise that you are not being yourself, I pray for it everyday. I don't want to lose you, I don't want to lose the best thing I've ever met.

Don't look for me because it's not our moment, it's not our time. If you are going to get worse, I'm proud of not being the responsible. I'm proud of being remembered, by you, by everyone, as the person who made you really happy. And, the worst of everything is that you are aware of it but you prefer pretending you are blind.

Good luck.